Monday, April 14, 2014

Why Be Catholic? 10 Years Later...

***Disclaimer: This post is not meant to insult any other faith, rather I am reflecting on why being Catholic is home for me. Why it makes sense.  Please read it with that mindset.

Ten years ago, I made a decision that would forever alter my life and bring me on to a new path of love and devotion.  That's right 10 years ago, at the Easter Vigil Mass I was brought into full communion in the Catholic church.  It was a big decision for me, one that I did not take lightly and one that initially I wasn't sure I wanted to make, but it was the best day of my life at that point and a decision that will always continue to bless my life.

So ten years later the question "Why be Catholic when I can be anything I want to be?" has been playing a lot in my mind lately.  In fact, just recently I had what I would call a crisis of faith.  I told my husband that I wasn't even sure I wanted to be Catholic anymore! (Gasp! Don't worry my dear Catholic friends...it was a short lived crisis.) You see, without going into my entire conversion story, you should know that my background is in the evangelical Christian church.  I was heavily involved an Assembly of God church, where I truly met the Lord for the first time.  I loved the music and the preaching at my church and being involved probably saved me going through high school.  But, as most do, I fell away from all church during college and wound up teaching at a Catholic school out of desperation! LOL! Truly...I don't lie. I just didn't know God was calling me home. 

OK, so back to my crisis.  You see these last 2 years have been exhausting for me.  You've read my story, you know the saga we've lived.  The Catholic church deep in her traditions and teachings wasn't reaching me for some reason.  Where I was and in some ways still am was needing something more, something beyond checking my time card each Sunday morning. (I recognize I was probably to blame for the most part.)  I gotta be honest, I was thinking about some of these new churches with a coffee bar in the lobby, a good 45 minute praise and worship session, a nursery for my little guy, women's Bible studies, Wednesday night church, and so much more.  I was thinking about that for a church and it was feeling very, very attractive to me.  I was needing to be fed and couldn't find that without feeling the need to start something myself and I gotta be honest...I don't have the mental capacity to start any ministries right now.  I wanted to be ministered to.  And yet, I was a Catholic and I know I'm never going to find a coffee bar in the lobby of my church nor be able to bring my coffee into Mass with me.  (LOL, can you tell I love my coffee?) And so I began to pray...nothing spectacular, but for a week the only prayer I could pray was this...

"Lord, help me fall in love with your church again..."
 
 
...and after a few conversations with my husband, two dear Catholic friends who I felt I could be totally honest with, and searching out a Catholic Church out in Ann Arbor...the Lord helped me love His church again.  So why do I choose to be Catholic? I'll tell you.  As appealing as those things I mentioned above are, I actually really and truly believe the teaching of the Catholic church.
 
 
I believe in the Sacraments.  I believe in the Eucharist.  When Christ said "This IS My body..." I am pretty sure He meant it.  What a gift that I get to invite the Lord in each week when I receive Him in Holy Communion.  I believe in the gift of the Sacrament of Reconciliation (confession).  A friend once told me it's the cheapest form of therapy out there! But all kidding aside, there is something so beautiful about admitting your sins to Christ through a priest and knowing that as you leave the confessional you are forgiven of your sins.  It's such a beautiful demonstration of the forgiveness of our Lord. 
 
I believe in our devotion to Mary and the Saints.  Although this teaching is one of the most misunderstood teachings of our church by other faiths, it is one of my strongest.  When I lost my son Jackson, I prayed to Mary for guidance and faith knowing that she knew all too well how difficult it was to lose a child.  When I was encountering another difficult pregnancy I prayed to St. Gianna and others to pray for me.  I love the Communion of Saints.  I love that there are people in heaven that I can ask to pray for me and take my prayers to the Lord especially when I am finding prayer especially difficult. 
 
I believe in Purgatory.  I find peace and comfort that in God's mercy, He knows that although we may not be fully ready to enter the gates of Heaven, He allows us to pray for others in order to purify our souls so that we are spotless before the Lord.  The Lord is just, and yet so full of love.
 
I truly believe that the Pope is the Vicar of Christ.  And just as Christ gave Peter the keys to His Church, I believe that we have a spiritual successor to lead and guide our church.  Oh and what awesome Popes we have had in the 10 years I have been a Catholic.  I especially love our current Pope, Pope Francis.  What a blessing he is to our church and wow! How much he has taught us in his few short months as our Pope? 
 
I believe in it all.  And although our Church is not perfect and there will never be a coffee bar or a 45 minute praise session, there is such beauty in the rich traditions and beautiful sacraments.  My family has found a new Catholic Church in the meantime that seems to be a good fit for us and our spirituality and that has helped.  And so even though I may struggle at times, I am a Catholic.  I am proud to be apart of the biggest mega church in the world! I am home. 

Friday, April 11, 2014

7 Quick Takes:Or maybe not...

It's Friday and it's 7 Quick Takes Day....I'm kind of feeling writer's block this morning, but still feel like writing.  So I will try for 7....but I make no promises.

***1***

For our wedding we got one of those BIG family Bibles.  I had it displayed on a shelf in our guest bedroom where it basically collected dust.  My husband decided it was time that we put it to use.  So we set it up in a more high traffic area in our house and every day or two Tom marks a new passage that we just kind of stop and read as we pass.  I wasn't sure it was going to be effective, but I find myself stopping during my busy day to read the passage and ponder on it...if even just for a second.  Then I look at the picture of Mary and the Child Jesus directly above it...ask for her help and move on with my day.  It's been a perfect little blessing in our home! Good idea, honey!

***2***

Sometimes I really struggle with the isolation that comes with being a Stay At Home Mom.  My neighborhood is mostly older couples or working adults and so some days I look out and there is no movement whatsoever.  The extrovert in me really struggles with this.  Noah is a little more mobile these days as the risk for germs has decreased, but we are also working on his daily schedule and naps are a must! Some days my only solace is checking in with friends on Facebook or some other form of social media.  I am looking for some baby and me type classes, but unfortunately they all seem to be in some other part of the metro Detroit area.  Anyways, I am hoping with summer approaching some things might change and I will feel like I get a little more adult conversation in...

Any ideas of places to go that are infant friendly and aren't shopping??  Anyone up for a play date?

***3***

I have been working on getting more active these past few weeks and I gotta tell you...2 years of bed rest and not being very active has taken a toll on my body!  I cannot believe how much effort a mile is for me these days!  I can feel my muscles complaining that they haven't gotten this much action in a long, long time.  I am determined to rebuild some muscle and continue to get healthier.  It's amazing what a little neglect can do to your body in such a short time.  I use an app called "Map My Walk" to measure how far I've gone.  It's super helpful and encouraging.  I am looking forward to improving my time and shedding some pounds in the mean time, too.  Who knows, maybe I will start  running again one of these days??  Until then...baby steps...

***4***

So a few weeks ago we started putting Noah in his crib for bedtime.  He's really done a fantastic job at night, but he will NOT take naps for any extended period of time in his crib.  It's the darndest thing!?  So it's back to his swing where he will sleep for 2-3 hours at a given time.  Silly boy...

On that same note...my little guy is still not sleeping through the night and I gotta tell you....I am really, really over it.  I love this sweet guy, but 5 months of getting up at least 1-2 times a night is taking it's toll on me.  I am hoping his doctor says we can start cereal soon and perhaps that will help!  Oh sweet, sweet sleep....I miss you.

***5***

So this is a Catholic thing...I always feel bad about decorating for Easter during Lent, but then once Easter has come I don't feel like decorating for Easter.  For many years I just didn't, but this year I did.  Anyways, it's probably stupid and silly, but what's a good Catholic to do? I know, I know...Easter is 50 days after Lent, but I always feel late to the party...

***6***

Running out of topics.....

How about in 10 days Lent will be over and I can go back to shopping at my beloved Target??? I've already started adding my Cartwheel coupons and am anticipating just walking through those beloved aisles taking it all in and hitting up a clearance rack or two! 

***7***

I made it to 7!

In 2 weeks I will be 35 years old! 35?!?!?!  That's just crazy...I'm not sure I like it.


Well, I did it.  I hope I didn't bore you with my 7 random thoughts for this week.  It's going to be sunny and beautiful this weekend! Get out there and enjoy yourselves!!!

Friday, April 4, 2014

7 Quick Takes:Cleaning Out

Happy Friday morning to you all!!  So far my little guy is sleeping in so I am going to attempt to get as many of my quick takes typed out before that little bundle of energy wakes up! I am on my 2nd cup of uninterrupted coffee and feeling fine!

***1***

The biggest news around these parts is that after 4 months of sleeping anywhere but his crib, our sweet boy has finally taken the plunge!  Last week after watching him grow more dependent on me for sleep I knew he was ready for his crib.  We put him in for the first time on Sunday night and he did fantastic!!  Hardly put up any kind of fuss!!  He still struggles sleeping in there from time to time during naps, and last night was a doozy falling asleep for him, but overall I would say it was a success!! I am so excited!!  It's been an adjustment for me not having him in our room, but I have also enjoyed having our room back to ourselves.  Not having to tiptoe around and being able to put on pjs with a light on have been glorious....that is on days that I wasn't in my pjs for the entire day. ;)  Anyways, GO NOAH!! Now if I can just get him to sleep for longer stretches...

***2***

The second biggest thing that has happened around these parts is after being inspired by my sister-in-law who gave up all artificial sweeteners and is feeling great and losing weight, I chose to do the same.  That means good-bye $1 Diet Cokes from McDonalds and anywhere else.  I have to say I feel better despite major craves for my beloved carbonated drink.  I have known for a long time that I should stop drinking diet pop and get aspartame out of my system, but never took the plunge, well after slowly working that way I finally did it!  I know that my body is better because of it.  I am really focusing on eating clean-er and making better choices for me and my family.  I look at Noah and know that I need to make these changes now so that when he starts with foods he will see a good example in Tom and I.  Chemical free is the way to be! 

***3***

In an effort to eat clean-er, I've joined the smoothie train! This week I made my first smoothie that had both spinach and kale in it...along with peaches, almond milk, and yogurt.  It was yummy and satisfying! I am looking forward to trying different recipes and exploring the world of smoothies.  Kudos again to my sister-in-law!!

***4***

Yesterday, I did an unofficial weighing of Noah by getting on the scale holding him, then putting him down and subtracting the difference!  Let's not talk about my weight....BUT Noah unofficially comes in at a whopping 11 lbs!!!!  Our little preemie is growing up! I can't wait to see his official weight in a few weeks at his well visit! It's so fun watching Noah start to learn and explore.  We are working on rolling over and holding things.  He is so alert and much more engaged.  He sits up in his chair for longer periods of time each day!

***5***

OK, so do you watch The Blacklist?  If you don't, you should! OMgoodness!!  It is so good and it keeps me on the edge of my seat each week.  It's one of the reasons I am so glad that when we cancelled our cable (which we don't miss at all by the way...) I am glad we got Hulu+.  Rarely can I finish a show that starts at 10pm, so I love catching up on my 2 favorite shows, The Blacklist and Parenthood, on Hulu.  Great investment!  We also have started watching the first season of Scandal on Netflix.  So good!!!!

***6***

After 6 months, a few heart to heart conversations with a few good friends, and a lot of prayer I decided this week to put away the pump for good.  It was a really hard decision for me.  Anyone who has exclusively pumped can relate that being chained to that pump multiple times a day is so very frustrating and stressful.  Well after cutting back already, I recognized that it was getting harder and harder for me to keep up with the pumping while taking care of Noah and my daily chores.  So this week I weaned myself off.  I am 100% relieved and about 50% guilty at the same time.  Thankfully, we have a nice stash of frozen breast milk to last us for a while supplementing with formula.  I am thankful that modern society has an option to help me feed my son, while still alleviating my stress level.  I feel judgment and sympathy from both sides of the fence, but in the end I decided to do what was best for my son and myself. I am thankful for the many months I was able to give Noah this gift and that I have enough frozen to go a bit longer.  I am also thankful for the extra time and effort I can put towards his life by being able to play with him and devote more time to him.  But oh the mommy guilt....

***7***

Did you see what I painted this week??  I love Painting with a Twist! My new favorite mommy outing!



***7.5***

I just have to tell you that my husband is a rock star! For so, so many reasons...anyways, today I am thankful that God chose Tom to be my husband.  He is such a blessing to both Noah and I.  I love you, Tom.  xo