Sunday, November 15, 2015

Oblivious

In 2001, when the World Trade Center in New York was hit by 2 planes hijacked by terrorists, my rose colored glasses fell off abruptly and I realized something I never realized before....there was true hatred and evil in this world.  At 21 years of age I had a sudden realization, that despite my desire to only see the good in this world, there was in fact a lot of bad.  A LOT. 

Oblivious.

Fast forward 14 years, and now I am a wife and a mother to 2 rambunctious little guys here on this earth.  Our days are mostly filled with Thomas the Train, ABC's, Daniel Tiger, books, puzzles, mischief, and detesting most foods that aren't cheese crackers or muffins.  My little guys spend their days learning new skills, playing/annoying one another, and protesting most forms of sleep.  This is their world.  They know unconditional love from their mom and dad and for the most part wear smiles on their faces. 

Joy. Content. Wonder and Awe.

Oblivious.

So when the terrorist attacks occurred this past Friday in Paris, I turned on the news while making the boys dinner (something I don't usually do....the news...not the dinner) and I watched in horror as once again the terrorists had seemed to win.  Terrorists had once again killed innocent people in the name of Allah.  And do you know what my boys did? They threw their food on the floor and protested their hot dogs.

Oblivious.

You see my boys don't care about hatred.  They've never heard the term ISIS or terrorist or bomb.  All they know is that mom has once again disappointed them with dinner and they would much rather be out of their chairs and making mischief and memories.  Their rose colored glasses remain. 

Oblivious.

...and you know what? I'm ok with that.  In fact, I am more than ok with that.  I have a very real desire to protect that oblivion for as long as I possibly can.

Becoming a parent does strange things to you.  Suddenly, you aren't worried about yourself anymore, but man oh man, you have a fierce desire in you to protect those little ones.  You'd do anything to make sure they were safe.  And so when I see images of people at a rock concert, a restaurant, and a sporting event being attacked, it makes me want to take my two little boys in my arms and never let them go.  It makes me want to build a bunker and protect them from all the bad stuff in this world.  It makes me want to keep them oblivious for as long as I possibly can. 

But the truth is...I can't.  And that scares the hell out of me.  One day, all too soon, their rose colored glasses will fall off, too.  Yes, we will do all that we can to protect them from that for as long as we can.  Yes, they will be older and more able to handle the information.  My husband and I will still be there to help explain (if there is an explanation for terrorists) and help calm their fears.  But one day, they will no longer be oblivious and for today, I don't know what to do about that.

Friday, November 6, 2015

7 Quick Takes: Musings of a Mom

Hard to believe it's November 6th already with the weather we've been having around here, but Halloween is over and it seems like we are gearing up for the Holiday at a rapid rate. So with that being said let's get on with my Quick Takes!

***1***

So speaking of holidays, I am super excited for the upcoming Advent/Christmas season.  Noah is starting to be old enough to start to get a little bit more about the season and I am trying to add some very age appropriate activities to our days counting down to Christmas.  So just what are these activities you ask????

I have purchased the items to make our very own Jesse tree to use for the years to come.  If you aren't familiar with the Jesse Tree it's a way of going through the story of Christ all the way back to the creation of the world.  Each day you read a little scripture and put the coordinating ornament on the little Jesse Tree.  We will be doing this each night while we light our Advent wreath and sing "O Come Emmanuel" together.  The whole thing will take less than 5 minutes, but I'm hoping it gets the kids a little bit of the story of Christ. I should give a shout out to my friend Mary for this idea. I totally stole it from her. (Feel free to steal it from me!)

After our little candle/tree service we will pick a book from the tree to unwrap and read together! I am happy to report we have all 25 books thanks to friends and our own collection.

I also plan to "hide" our elf every day for Noah to find.  I'm pretty opposed to Elf on the Shelf, but Noah loves seek and find books and to point things out, so I think this will be fun for him and maybe a way to introduce "Elf on the Shelf" **cringe**

I'm sure there will be other special moments in our holiday prep, but I'm really excited to make some special memories with my boys!


***2***

Keeping with the theme of the Holidays, would you believe I am done shopping for Noah already and cannot think of anything to get Jonah. (Poor second child...) It's hard to hold back and not keep buying "things" especially when each day I seem to get rid of or put up another toy that isn't being played with, but yet I am so excited to see our little guy's face on Christmas morning.  There is such a joy for me in buying and giving gifts, especially for my kids.  I'm trying very hard though to keep things in perspective.  For example, I know Jonah won't understand that he has less gifts than Noah under the tree.  It's silly to buy just to buy...especially for a 1 year old...who has a birthday 4 days later!

This year I'm also doing a lot of homemade gifts and I'm excited to use my time making some gifts for my loved ones with thought and love.  I sure hope they appreciate them too.


***3***

So another shout for my friend, Mary.  She's  pretty much a rockstar who just gave birth in September to her 4th child and her oldest child is 4.  Anyways, she posted this awesome blog today about how she's learning to keep her house in order with 4 kids 4 and under.  The thing is, we've been having lots of conversations lately about her little changes and she's really been inspiring me to change the way I do things around my house too.  I won't repeat all that she has to say...go read her blog...but I will summarize by saying I'm learning to never leave a room without taking what I can to any other room it needs to go to.  I'm learning the need to declutter with a vengeance...less toys, less piles, less, less, less.  (Less really is more.)  And finally, I'm making the choice to pick up the Living Room toys every day at nap time instead of leaving it until bed time.  Yes, a lot of the toys come back out, but not all of them usually do and having the Living Room picked up for a bit really makes me feel much better in the evenings and when I first wake up in the morning.

***4***

So, I must tell you, I'm not a huge fan of Thanksgiving normally.  Yes, I enjoy the meal and family time, but it's just not high on my list for some reason.  But this year, I'm trying to embrace the whole Thankfulness of the season and recognize my blessings in a special way.  So tell me...what do you do to make Thanksgiving special? What traditions? What makes Thanksgiving special for you?

Help a girl out....

***5***

So, the weather we have this week it's been awesome to spend outside.  The boys have enjoyed a few trips to the park, crunching leaves outside, and a little fresh air.  And don't get me wrong it was lovely.  What was not lovely is that it has gotten all of us sick.  I ended up with a sinus infection and bronchitis.  Noah's allergies are through the roof.  Just today Jonah's nose started running...again.  So we kind of are ready for the weather to break, the moldy leaves to be gone, and for the ridiculous amount of kleenex being used to decrease in a major way.  I need to get back on a daily vitamin and get on a healthy regiment of water and exercise too! It's time for some extra health in these parts.  We've got holidays to celebrate!

***6***

In saying that, I'm also gearing up for winter and what that means for a mom and her 2 boys.  More days stuck at home than we'd like.  So, I'm trying to make some plans.  Have my list of places to visit things to do.  So tell me all you moms of little kids.  How do you survive winter?  Where are your favorite places to visit to let your kids burn off some energy and get a chance of scenery?  Also, what activities do you keep on hand to keep your little ones busy when you are stuck at home.  I've been doing my due diligence on Pinterest, but it's always nice to hear from the real moms in the trenches.  So hit me up!

***7***

Ok last little thought for you.  Burlap...it's my favorite.  Burlap pumpkins, doilies, wreaths....it's my current fav.

Have a wonderful weekend everyone!  Happy memory making with those you love best!!




Sunday, October 18, 2015

"Failure to Thrive"

Tonight at our dinner table was like dinner at most dinner tables of families with toddlers.  Lots of "no's" and "one more bites" and "no you can't have candy corn for dinner." (Doesn't everyone say that?) On tonight's menu...chili.  It's one food I can usually get Noah to eat.  But like any two year old, just because he liked it last time it was served, it holds no guarantee for tonight's meal.  And so, like any good mom, I loaded it up with cheese, tried to hide the tomatoes, and held my breath.  It was touch and go there for a few minutes, I may have had to do a head lock for the first bite to convince him, that yes indeed he actually did like chili and should at least try a bit, but finally we convinced him it was good!  There were cheers...no literally, cheers with each bite, and there was candy corn rewards at the end, and Tom and I breathed a sigh of relief for one more meal down.

Unfortunately, not every meal is this successful.  Not every headlock reminds my son that he likes a food and not every meal gets eaten.  What you don't know is that a few weeks ago his doctor was forced to give him the label "Failure to Thrive" after not gaining any weight over 3 months and once again falling off the growth curve.  And that's what has started this crazy meal time excitement in our home.

It was a well visit like any other, wrestling two kids, praying they didn't catch the leftover germs in the waiting room, and pulling out all the bells and whistles to keep a 2 year old and 9 month old entertained.  You know, totally normal stuff.  Then after the pleasantries were shared we stripped the kids and headed to the scale.  Jonah went first and weighed in at a whopping 18 pounds! Then Noah followed in at 21 lbs and 14 ounces....exactly what he had weighed 3 months prior.  I was concerned and waited for his doctor.  When she finally came in, we had the talk, and she said the words that no mother wants to hear...his diagnosis "Failure to Thrive."

And do you know what I heard??? Failure. Failure.. Failure...Failure...

Somehow despite my headlocks, Pediasures, beggings, pleadings, olive oil hiding attempts, my child had gained no weight and was deemed a failure, and therefore, as his mother, so was I.

And do you know what I did?? I cried.  For two days.  Every time I looked at that happy, smiling, crazy two year old who loved life, I cried.  Because somehow, despite my best efforts and intentions, somehow by these medical standards, the little boy I am totally crazy about wasn't "thriving."  That one stung.

And after a few days and multiple vials of blood drawn to rule every disease out there out, I pulled on my big girl pants and we began to seriously focus on fattening this little guy up.  Do you know I can make scrambled eggs with roughly 30 grams of fat in them?  I cook everything in butter or olive oil that I can.  If it doesn't have fat in it, Noah doesn't get to eat it.  (Well, that's mostly true.  He does get apple sauce since it's the only fruit he will eat.) I've searched the internets for high fat recipes and have unsuccessfully attempted to hide avocado in some foods too.  (Little stinker found me out...)

I did all of this, because that's what we mothers do.  We rise in the face of adversity. No one is going to call my kid a failure and get away with it.

Luckily, all of his blood work has come back normal and we have one final test coming up to rule out a highly improbable diagnosis of Cystic Fibrosis, and so we thank God for that.  But I've gotta tell you....it's exhausting.  All day long,  I'm adding fat grams in my head.  No more glasses of water, only milk. Racking up number of mini muffins he's had (with 2 grams of fat in each) Not caring if we've already had McDonald french fries this week.  He eats them and they are fatty.  Feeling beyond frustrated when he doesn't eat because not only is that normal toddler behavior annoying, it means I'm gonna have to try even harder at the next meal.

But today I needed to remind myself that even though our little miracle child isn't "thriving" in terms of his weight, he is thriving in so many other things.  There are just 4 letters left before Noah is able to identify each by name (H, Q, W, and Y in case you're wondering.) After not walking for so long, our little guy is not only running circles around us, he's mastering slides, stairs, and his Little Tikes car! He's a wiz at the "Find It" books and each day he's adding to his vocabulary.  He is loving, caring, funny, and an overall happy child.

And those things mean he is thriving! He's thriving at life. And you know what that makes me?? A pretty good mama.  Because I've got to be doing at least a few things right in raising such an awesome kid.  I needed to remind myself of that.

And maybe that's why I needed to write this.  Your child might not have the label of "Failure to Thrive," but maybe it's another label.  ADD, ADHD, LD....or maybe there is no label, but there certainly are struggles despite your best efforts.  To you moms out there (and to myself, too) Let's be a little kinder, a little gentler with ourselves today.  Let's remember that we are all doing our very best with these complicated creatures that have be entrusted to our care.  We will continue to fight and advocate for our children.  I will continue to fatten up every meal I can.  We will seek advice and read all that we can, but at the end of the day what matters most is that we loved.  That's what they will remember amidst their struggles, a mama that was there with them every step of the way.

Friday, October 9, 2015

Crumbs and fingerprints

Some days when I am in the middle of my day, I take a moment and think back to those delusional days of my first 30 years of what I thought life as a mom would be like.  The romanticized visions of playing with my kids, snuggling with a newborn at 3 am, and memory making makes me giggle.  Now don't get me wrong, there are still lots of memories made and snuggles too (even at 3 am when I'd much rather be sleeping than rocking a 9 month old), but there isn't a whole lot of romance or euphoric moments going on in those trenches. Yes, motherhood is glorious, but it is equal parts messy....very, very messy. 

This blog began to form in my brain earlier this week when in a moment of frustration as I was sweeping the kitchen floor for the 3rd time that MORNING (we hadn't even made it to lunch yet), I looked around to see ridiculous amounts of fingerprints mixed in with our monster window clings on the front door.  There were enough puffs on the floor to feed an army....well at least my army.  Noah's milk cup was dripping on the floor in the living room and Jonah was once again throwing all the magnetic letters back to the floor even though they had just been picked up.  I may have let out a frustrated little scream! The kids, well, they laughed and continued to make mayhem, and I swept up the floor and we continued on.  But later that night, after both boys were in bed, I looked at my living room that was full of toys and was really feeling frustrated.  No one told me that motherhood would be this messy.  So, so messy.

But honestly, the physical messes are just one thing.  Motherhood's messiness goes beyond poopy diapers and dumped plates on the floor.  Motherhood is messy at 3am and you can't stop the tears or get your child to sleep.  Motherhood is messy when despite your best efforts, your child still can't get back on the growth curve and is given the title of "failure to thrive."  Motherhood is messy when your child is hurting and there is nothing you can do to make it better.  There are messes like neglected husbands and careers that despite the fact you know they need some attention, you have found yourself completely drained and unable to squeeze out anything. 

So this week Tuesday, after a difficult Monday at the doctor's office with both of my boys, a sink full of dishes, floors to be swept for the hundredth time (or so it felt), and finger prints once again adorning my front door...I cried.  Ugly, messy tears.  I cried on and off all day.  "Motherhood is hard." I told a friend.  And we've all heard mothers before us claim, "It's the hardest thing they've ever done," but we don't believe them until we are in the trenches on those Tuesdays, stuck between the mundane and monotonous and the big, loud, and messy that we understand.

And do you know why Motherhood's messy job description is so hard???

Because of faces like these....



Because even though they are champion mess makers, they are worth every mess, too.  We get so frustrated with them, and then they smile at us, or finally say that word we've been working on for months, or take their first steps across the kitchen.  Suddenly, it doesn't matter that there are crumbs on the ground or fingerprints on windows because we are cheering with them and celebrating their successes! Or when we finally plop down on the couch to take a moment and they curl up in our laps and snuggle with us, as if to let us know they appreciate us and love us.

It's in those moments of snuggles, celebrations, and smiles that we get our strength to clean up one more mess.  To figure out one more recipe that maybe our child will finally eat.  We find the resolve to crawl out of bed at 3 am, because despite every expert's advice "cry it out" doesn't work for this little guy and sometimes you just need to see your mom, messy hair and bags under her eyes.

Then this morning the Beatitudes popped into my head....You know the "Blessed are the...., For they shall..." (See Matthew 5 for the text) But I noticed those who were called blessed were those who mourn, who are merciful, who make peace (can you believe a 2 year old and 9 month old already fight?), and who are persecuted.  Now I'm sure Christ wasn't specifically talking about moms in this passage, but it made me think about the old adage that "Anything hard is worth working for."  The easy road usually doesn't give the fulfillment and reward that the road with the difficult terrain brings to those of us who choose to travel it's hills and valleys. 

If motherhood wasn't so messy, so hard we wouldn't cry at preschool graduation or when our babies leave for college. If motherhood was easy, we wouldn't have awesome kids who stand up for what is right and know how to share.  If motherhood was easy, we wouldn't know that true sacrificial type love of Christ. 

SoBlessed are the moms, for they shall inherit the kingdom of God...one mess at a time.

Friday, September 25, 2015

7 Quick Takes of Joy

The last week, and especially these last few days, one word has really stuck with me.  JOY.  Like deep down, unaltered, pure JOY.  I've been reflecting a lot about that and where that joy has been creeping up in my life and in my mind.  So here we go!

***1***

This past Wednesday we celebrated Noah's 2nd birthday! The Sunday before it we celebrated with family and friends at his birthday party.  Up until recently, our Noah has been a little weary of big crowds and loud noises, so I wasn't exactly sure how he was going to react to being the center of attention.  Well I've gotta tell you, what I saw from our big 2 year old was pure JOY.  The JOY that radiates from that child is contagious to anyone he comes into contact with.  If it's at Target shopping with mom or running around the farm with the kids, there is something different about that little guy.  Our little miracle boy gives off and knows a JOY so lovely, so perfect I pray that as he grows older this sometimes difficult and cruel world doesn't steal that away from him.  His friends and family just want to be around him.  He is a light in all of our eyes and reminds me of all that is still good in this world. 

***2***

The next biggest example of JOY going on these days has to be the JOY seen in the faces of all those following our dear Holy Father's journey around the United States.  Being a Catholic I am overjoyed at his trip here and love to hear him speak and be encouraged by what he has to say.  But I am far more impressed by how those that are not Catholic are responding to his visit.  Pope Francis is by far the greatest example of JOY going on today.  Kissing babies, loving on the poor, encouraging the religious and non-religious alike, and doing it all with a smile on his face and peace in his heart.  Pope Francis is JOY personified and anyone and everyone who finds themselves in his presence can't help but catch the bug!  His JOY, the JOY of Christ, is contagious!

***3***

Speaking of the JOY of being in the presence of the Holy Father, did you see this article about John Boehner? If you saw any coverage of the Pope's speech to congress you couldn't miss the grown man crying in the background.  Today, after being asked by the Pope to pray for him and having an obvious moment of conversion and perspective, he announced his retirement from Congress.  Did you see the JOY and PEACE in his face? Gosh, I just love Holy Spirit moments like that!!!!  I'll be honest, I'm not always great at following politics, and I don't really know much about Mr. Boehner, but I do believe the world watched Christ move in this man's life through the Holy Father and that my friends is a beautiful thing.

***4***

I belong to MOPS (Mothers of PreSchoolers) and twice a month I gather with other to pray and converse and build each other up.  This year the theme for MOPS is "A Fierce Floursing."  There are 3 components to this theme; Celebrate Lavishly, Embracing Rest, and Noticing Goodness. 
A Fierce Flourishing Theme
As a mom who hasn't slept much in 9 months, I'm good at the Embracing Rest component.  I embrace rest every time I can with two little ones.  But yesterday we talked about Celebrating Lavishly.  The speakers spoke about celebrating life in tangible and intangible ways.  About filling others cups and letting your cup be filled.  Celebrating life's little moments and not just the big.  I'm good at big celebrations! I love to do holidays and birthdays to the full capacity, but what really struck a chord in me as I sat there was that word JOY that has been stewing inside of me for a few days now.  I began to think about how I celebrate the little stuff.  What kind of JOY am I bringing to my house and to my family members.  How am I finding joy in the mundane and every day moments? And I'll be honest, especially lately, I'm not sure I have been.  It's easier for me to focus on the fact that I'm tired, the kids are fussy, and the fact that I need just one more cup of coffee before I can function.  Ouch.  I don't feel so good about that.  So I'm trying.  I'm trying to bring JOY into my house again even at 4:30 in the morning and my two year old can't sleep.  I'm trying to bring JOY to the dinner table when no one wants to eat and food inevitably ends up all over the floor to be swept...again.  I'm trying to find JOY in the fatigue of the day to day.  Will you pray for me?

***5***

This kid....pure JOY.  And what makes him so JOYful these days you ask???  Standing up.  Anywhere and on anything. 
 
***6***

A little musical interlude.....


***7***
My prayer for all of you this week is that you find JOY in the little things.  I'm praying for those who will be gathering in Philadelphia for the World Meeting of Families.  I am certain there will be immense JOY coming home from my friends that are on their way right now!  God Bless you All!! 


Friday, September 11, 2015

7 Quick Takes: God Bless the USA!

It's been a crazy morning here already and it's only 8:30 am!  God help this mom get through the day!  Luckily Jonah just laid down for his nap and Noah is involved with blocks and Curious George.  I'm still waiting for my caffeine to do it's trick and thought I would take a few minutes to write my blog!

So let's do this!

***1***

Today is September 11th and I would feel irresponsible if I didn't take a minute to reflect on what this day means to me.  I was 22 years old when terrorists decided to change history and cause such grief and havoc on American soil.  I was student teaching and just beginning my adult life really.  September 11th taught me many adult lessons.  I learned about true fear, real hatred, and that none of it mattered because I had to be brave for the students I was teaching.

Fast forward 14 years and I have 2 little boys who have no idea what today means (they will one day as we teach them the pride of being Americans) and their only concern is being fed and playing with toys.  I'm almost envious of their naivety and wish I could keep it that way forever.  It saddens me that one day they too will have to grow up and deal with these scary realities. 

I pray one day we will all know true peace on earth.

***2***

Jonah, he's a crazy rambunctious boy!!  I'm pretty sure he will be standing in no time and crawling out of his crib too!  He had zero fear and loves pulling himself up! We have some more baby proofing to do in this house.  He also has allergies to both milk and peanuts and yet is constantly trying to steal his brother's food and cups.  I love his spirit and smile, however.  This little guy is going to keep us on our toes!

***3***

Do you know what I hate more than anything this time of year?  Political ads! I'm so glad we don't have cable and rarely watch live TV because the little I do see of political propaganda is annoying....already...and it's only September.

***4***

In just 12 days our little Noah will be 2 years old! I can't believe it! He's come so far in his 2 years here on earth.  It's funny, ok and frustrating to watch him become a real life 2 year old.  He's great at throwing himself on the ground already and acting as if getting your diaper changed is pretty much the same as torture.  Luckily, he also is so smart and I love watching him learn something new every day! He seriously amazes Tom and I.  We are enjoying watching him learn new words and conquer new challenges too! It makes those screaming fits worth it....kind of.

***5***

This Tuesday I picked up my minivan!!!!  I seriously am in love with my minivan. (Other than the hands free prompts...that lady in my radio clearly needs hearing aids!) I love that it is making my life just a little bit easier.  I swore I'd never drive a minivan, but man oh man....that was silly of me! I feel pretty cool tooling around town in my minivan each day! Noah loves the big windows to look out and we can't wait to turn him around so he can watch a DVD on long trips! I'm pretty sure this minivan is the greatest thing that has happened to us outside of well you know all the major blessings in life!

***6***

This week most of the kids went back to school....I gotta be honest, as much as I love being a SAHM, this time of year makes me miss teaching! I loved getting my room ready and planning and dreaming of a great school year to come.  I loved buying new school supplies, the smell of new crayons and freshly sharpened pencils.  I really enjoyed this part of my job.  Nostalgia....and then I remember a lot of the things I don't miss.  But I'm glad one day soon my boys will have their first days at school and we can enjoy new backpacks, crayons, and lunch boxes once again!

***7***

I'm ending today with a shameless plug.  I'm looking to make some extra money to help with our family budget while still staying at home with my boys.  If you know anyone looking for someone for at home day care I am looking to take on a few kids at my house.  Part time or full time.  Send them my way.  I also will be tutoring on Saturday mornings and one or two evenings at our local library.  If your child or someone you know needs some homework help or extra tutoring please let me know!

Have a great weekend y'all! It's gonna be a beautiful fall weekend! Get out there and pick some apples, eat some donuts, or buy some mums! Whatever you do enjoy your time with those you love best!

Friday, August 28, 2015

7 Quick Takes: Roller Coaster Ramblings

It's that time again....Noah is playing with his blocks, Jonah is taking his morning nap, and I've managed to shower somehow and am taking a few minutes to blog my thoughts. This week has been a little bit of a roller coaster (thus the title) of good and challenging things. I'm always excited though that it's Friday and soon my hubby will be home for the weekend! My favorite!

***1***

Earlier this week, for a day or so I was brave enough to have the thought that "Hey, I think I'm an OK mom.  I finally got my act together!" Bwahahahhaha...the next day I was feeling anything, but adequate.  Jonah didn't sleep, Noah was having some tantrums and showing his frustration with his limited vocabulary and Tom was running late from work. I wondered what I was doing wrong on every front.  But I've been a mom long enough now to know that that's how motherhood is.  Just when you feel like you've got a control of things, things suddenly get way out of control.  At the end of the day I need to remember that my kids are fed, loved, and for the most part thriving.  That means I've got to be doing 1 or 2 things right....right??

***2***

So this week something has really been bothering me.  REALLY bothering me.  I can't stop thinking about the Ashley Madison Affair scandal.  Josh Duggar and his poor family.  Is our world really
that messed up??  Is there any hope for marriages?? Am I ignorant for trusting my husband and not thinking that something like this could happen to us? (Just to be clear, I totally trust my husband...) I just am so upset that these are the odds we are facing.  This is the message our children are learning that if you aren't happy in your marriage you can just go have an affair.  And it doesn't matter what you think about Josh Duggar, those of us of faith have to realize that just because we go to church with our family and call ourselves Christians that we aren't going to have these temptations in our marriages.  I know plenty of Christian men and women that struggle with lust and pornography...and I imagine adultery too. 

I don't know what to do to resolve these feelings other than pray with and for my husband and our marriage and teach my boys the best I can about the sacrament of marriage.  It is a sad reality regardless.

***3-4-5*** (I've gotta be concise today...nap time is running out)

My thoughts haven't been all sad and depressing this week I assure you.  Inspired by the book  I mentioned last week, "The Gifts of Imperfection" by Brene Brown, I have been thinking about when am I most happy and content in my life.  It was really an eye opening experience for me.  I realized that some of my happiest moments are the times when my family of 4 are together just living life.  Watching my kids enjoy time with their dad, singing silly songs together, working on little projects together.  Yes, we love hanging with our friends, going places, and having fun at our local hang outs, but some of my best moments are those with my little family.  We love watching our boys learn and grow.

The next thing I noticed is how much I personally enjoy doing little crafts.  My mom is the ultimate crafter and I am no where near her status of craftiness, but I do love doing little things .  I was surprised when my book talked about how having time to be crafty and creative is very stress reducing and fulfilling.  I realized how true that was for me.  I love my craft nights with my friend Cheryl and making gifts with my kids for their grandparents.  It's definitely something I want to make more time for in my life.  DIY here I come!!

The last thing I noticed is the joy I received when I was able to go to Mass alone with my husband a few times this summer alone.  There is such an intimacy in praying with your spouse.  We try to pray together at night, but it doesn't always happen.  We also love bringing our children to mass with us, but it really was lovely and very inspiring to pray the Mass, the greatest of prayers, along side my husband with no distractions.

***6***

I cannot believe in just a few days summer unofficially will be over, September will be here, Labor Day will be celebrated, and the lazy days of summer will be coming to an end.  I have mixed feeling about this.  I love fall.  It is my favorite time of year, I hate the heat after awhile, and I'm ready for some of our fall activities to resume and bring a little more organization to our days.  But the end of summer also means my parents will soon be heading back to Florida for the winter, which is a huge bummer for me and my boys.  I love the memories they are able to make when my parents are here for the summer.  We are going to have to try and figure out a way to get down to Florida this winter. Life also gets a lot busier for a lot of my friends with older kids and I'll miss our time together with them.  It's a mixed bag.  Luckily there is candy corn to help me get through it all.  ;)

***7***

My Noah LOVES Thomas the train and all trains in general.  We didn't intend for it to happen, and we love that he does, I just find it so interesting how little boys just gravitate towards little boys things.  It's in their make up to just love these things.  It's so fun watching him imagine and be creative with his train table.  He lines them up and makes the sounds too.  He can even tell you a few of their names.  I am interested to see if Jonah falls in love with him too. 

We are planning to take them to Thomas's World in Massachusetts next summer! I just know they are going to go crazy over it!!


Have a great weekend friends!! I'm hitting up the Mom2Mom sale of the year (or so I hear...) and making memories with my boys! I hope you all are doing something that makes your heart swell with joy as well!
worrying that something like this could mess up our marriage?

Friday, August 21, 2015

7 Quick Takes:Bouncing Around in my Mind

It's Friday and that means it's time for Quick Takes.  I promised myself I was going start blogging again each week, even if it's just Quick Takes.  So although I already put out one blog today (did you read it yet?) I want to stick to my promise and bust out some quick takes before Jonah wakes up.

***1***

Noah left with my parents for his first sleepover at the lake.  That means it's mommy and Jonah time until daddy gets home.  I forgot what one kid feels like.  And although I wouldn't have agreed when I just had my one kid, man is it easy!!!! Especially one kid that is barely mobile.  Gosh, I needed to cherish those days.  Tom and I are looking forward to spoiling our little Jonah tonight while his big brother is gone. 

***2***

Two words....The Don.  I mean what the heck is he doing?  And how is he gaining momentum?  I won't say that he hasn't had some good points, but I'm just not sure that Donald Trump is really the answer for this country. What is this world really coming to?

I'll stick with Ben Carson for now....

***3***

Speaking of the news, I'm sure you've heard about the Ashley Madison affair site that got hacked and just this past week 32 million names were released!  Did you read that??? 32 MILLION NAMES!!!! Ladies and gentlemen, I am beyond shocked and appalled (though maybe I shouldn't be?).  Lord Jesus save us! 32 million MARRIED men and women are using an internet site to have an extra marital affair.  I just can't even....

***4***

And to piggy back on that I'm sure you've also heard that Josh Duggar, of 19 Kids and Counting, was found to be one of the 32 million using that site.  I have so many thoughts on him and his whole situation, but I am certain many people are commenting on that.  He needs no judgement and condemnation from me, though I certainly am devastated for his wife and children, but I think he offers all of us who call ourselves Christians a real lesson.  It's real important that we practice what we preach.  And it's even more important to remember that we are all flawed and sinful human beings.  We have to be careful how we present ourselves and allow ourselves to be portrayed, because frankly none of us are without sin in some way or another.  When we put ourselves out there proclaiming Christ it's important that we strive to be the best version of ourselves and yet humble enough to admit our flaws.  Our pastor at our church always says that a priest is "a sinner called among sinners to lead others to Christ."  That's just it.  We need to always remember where we came from and that is a place of sin that we have redemption in only because of Christ.  We need to be ever grateful of his mercy and sacrifice.  We as Christians also need be real careful not to think we are better than others because of this gift or look down upon others because they may not.  We all have "skeletons in the closet" so to say that need to keep us on our knees in forgiveness and give us patience and understanding with each other.

Many prayers for this family that is certainly living in Hell on Earth right now.

***5***

Ok, on to happier and more positive things...

NOAH IS A FULL FLEDGE WALKER!!!!!!! My little guy took his good sweet time, but as of Saturday he is a walking machine!  Woo hoo!!!!!  He's so proud too.  Mom and Dad are too!

***6***
Yesterday we took Jonah to get his allergy tests done and as I suspected, on top of his peanut allergy he is also allergic to milk and coconut and possibly to eggs. (We will be testing him with some eggs in the coming weeks.)  It is possible that he can grow out of both his milk and peanut allergy in a few years (prayers please) but for now it's not peanuts or milk for a year! Yikes!

So here's where you come in....our little Jonah likes to eat.  Give me your ideas on good filling protein filled alternatives to milk and peanut butter we can feed our little guy besides beans and meat.  I know there are a few veggies with protein out there, but I'm feeling a little lost. 

Help a momma out!


***7***

These past few days have been absolutely beautiful!  Temps in the 70s.  Lovely cool breezes.  Makes me want to put all my shorts and swim suits away and suit up for fall!  Bring on the apples, sweaters, pumpkins, jeans, football, leaves, and candy corn!! Gosh I love fall!  I hope there are many more lovely days like this to come as we enter Indian summer!

But for now, those of you who love summer (and don't get me wrong, it has it's perks) get out there and enjoy this beautiful weekend we are going to have!!  Soak up that sun and drink a cold beer....maybe even do one final cannon ball into the deep end for old times sake!




Imperfect Love

 


I've been thinking a lot about my two boys lately.  Although only 15 months apart, they are so very different already.  Noah, my older son, is joy personified truly.  He loves life and almost always has a smile on his face.  He is vivacious and loud!  He's also, however, cautious and not a huge risk taker.  He likes to take situations in before he engages and does things when he is good and ready despite our desires to rush him.  He is methodical and very observant...especially when it comes to letters and trains.  Jonah, although we are just learning a lot about him is our more pensive child.  He's a thinker.  Even more observant than his brother, he loves to watch cars drive by and see what his big brother is doing.  Jonah is sensitive and a mama's boy.  Noah could care less about food most days, Jonah already hunts us down if he sees or smells something.  Noah hates to go to bed, but then sleeps great.  Jonah is ready for bed early like his mom, but is up on and off all night. 


The thing is I love both these boys very much, and yet very differently.  Noah needs me to encourage him in many things, hold his hand when he's unsure, and celebrate life with him.  Jonah needs me to be patient, give him lots of snuggles, and be sensitive with him when he needs it.  It's not always easy to be the mom they need when they are throwing food on the floor, crying for the third time that night, or not sharing nicely.  I'm easily frustrated by their little habits that make my life just a little bit more difficult.

None of this is new to any mother out there, but what I started to think about was that despite their differences, difficulties, and temperaments I still love them unconditionally.  In fact, I can't imagine loving anyone as much as I do these two handsome boys.  And that got me thinking about God and how He loves each one of us just the way we are.  All of us flawed, all of us difficult, each of our temperaments and quirks.  He loves us.  And not only does He love us, He loves us just as we are.  Just the way we need to be loved and where we are at in our lives.

This, too, is not a revelation. But finally my thoughts came to me, and how I love myself.  I love my boys, unique as they are, unconditionally.  I won't love Noah more if he eats everything I put on his plate.  (Though that would be nice.)  My love for Jonah won't grow if he FINALLY sleeps through the night.  I can look at my husband and see beyond his flaws and nuances, and love him, and YET I seem to struggle doing the same for myself. 

There is a verse in the Bible that I would imagine all of us have heard; "Love your neighbor, as you love yourself."  We are really good about working on loving our neighbor, but we seem to skip over that second part....or at least I always did.  We have to love our neighbor AS WE LOVE OURSELVES.  I don't know about all of you, but I'm actually a lot better at loving my neighbor than I am at loving myself. 

I'm fat. My house is a mess more often than it's not.  My feet need a pedicure and my face needs a good wax.  Sometimes I choose to nap instead of doing the dishes.  I'm impatient at times and I can swear like a truck driver.  My prayer life sucks and I'm pretty much a subpar mother. Not to mention I'm JUST a stay at home mom. 

These are things I would say to myself over and over again.  The self talk going on in my mind wasn't kind.  It wasn't pleasant.  It wasn't love. The truth of the matter is I can love my family, friends, neighbors, but I wasn't real good at loving myself.  There were too many conditions, too many flaws. I worried about what others would think about me and felt judged by comments in life and on Facebook.  I was so busy beating myself up that I was certain that others were beating me up too. 

Then one day I happened to pick up the book  "The Gifts of Imperfection; Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are" by Brene Brown.  Her book on living a Whole Hearted Life was the stepping stone to changing me and helping me to learn to love myself....flaws and all.  It's an ongoing process, one that requires faith, forgiveness, and acceptance, but I can wake up each day and like myself a little bit more.  Yes, I'd like to lose weight and be healthier, but that doesn't mean I can't love the fat Erin too.  I'd love my house to be cleaner, but I can love and accept the fact that despite my best efforts, it's probably never going to be spic and span.  Slowly, but surely, I am learning to love me for me.  Learning to love me for the things I do well and quite frankly for the things I don't do well.  Because I love my neighbor that way and God calls me to love myself that way. 

So I challenge each of you who may have happened to stumble on this blog today.  Take a minute to love your self today.  All of you.  Each imperfection, each love handle, and each lovely thing that makes you, YOU.  Although many are challenged to love their neighbor as themselves, I think it's important that we turn that around sometimes and question ourselves, "Do we love ourselves as we love our neighbor?"

Friday, August 14, 2015

7 Quick Takes...Letting My Thoughts Go Public Again

So blogging is something I love, but 7.5 months ago I gave birth to a little boy who hates sleep and therefore most of my free time during the day has been trying to squeeze in a nap to make up for the night.  But blogging is something I love, something that excites me.  So I'm going to try and get back in the saddle and at least get my 7 quick takes out each week.

Welcome back friends.....

***1***

So last Friday a small miracle occurred in my life as a mother and wife.  My parents took my boys out to their house and my husband met them out there, which meant for roughly 24 hours I was completely on my own.  It was so glorious and yet so weird...mostly glorious.  I started off the day with a pedicure and a haircut, both desperately needed.  Then after shopping solo at Target I rushed home to get ready for my date! My friend Cheryl and I went out to dinner at my favorite Mexican restaurant and then headed to Plymouth to make some pottery.  It was so fun!  The following morning I attended a brunch for the local "Blessed is She" group and was blessed to listen to my dear friend Mary speak.  24 hours....24 wonderful hours....

You know what was really lovely too about those hours?  Besides sleeping all night??? I got to spend time with some of the awesome women in my life.  I don't know about the rest of you, but having 2 kids under the age of 2, has meant some strain on my friend relationships.  It's hard to get together and keep in touch, especially outside of play dates and Facebook.  It was so lovely to share our stories, frustrations, a drink or two, and be vulnerable with each other.

Gosh, I don't know about you, but I need my friends.  So. Much. So. So. Much.  It's hard to make the time when you're exhausted at the end of the day and you don't really feel like talking to anyone, but I am committed to making time with my friends more of a priority in my life.


***2***

I could never live somewhere that didn't have the 4 seasons.  I'm always ready for the next season.  It's August 14th and I am really starting to get ready for fall.  Like tempted to put up my pumpkins and buy some candy corn....but I'll wait.  (Especially since it's going to be 90 all week.)

***3***

On Thursday our little Jonah will go for allergy testing.  After an extremely scary and strong reaction to peanut butter 5 weeks ago we will be finding out if he is not only allergic to peanuts, but also any other nuts.  We are going to have the doctor test for milk because he seems to be having issues with milk and while we are at it, eggs.  The world of anaphylactic allergies is scary.  Even though I am a epi pen carrying girl myself due to shell fish, it's a whole nother issue when it's your kid.  Especially a little guy who picks up everything off the ground and doesn't yet know what peanuts or peanut butter are.  Not to mention his brother doesn't either.  And it's amazing just how many things have nuts or are made in a factory where it's possible that nuts have contaminated the product.  Because I am breastfeeding still, I too have had to cut out all nuts from my diet.

I always thought the peanut free school or peanut free lunch table was a little extreme, but I went to Funtastic play center in Woodhaven last week and was so relieved that they were a peanut free facility and I didn't have to worry that when Jonah crawled around he wasn't going to accidentally come into contact with peanut butter that I now get it.  These allergies are scary and baffling and no one quite knows why it's such an issue.  I'm certain we will learn lots more with this journey and we pray that he will be one of the lucky ones that grow out of it.

***4***

For the past 33 days I have been reading a devotional called "33 Days to Morning Glory."  It's a preparation for a consecration to Christ through Mary.  Ever since I have become a mother Mary has been my go to.  I still obviously prayed to God, but going to Christ through Mary has felt much more comfortable to me.  Mary being a wife, mother, and woman feels so relateable to me.  Since becoming a mother, however, my prayer life has taken a dive into the tank.  Yes, I know my life is my prayer and taking care of my family can be a prayer, but I really needed to get some sort of prayer life back on track.  One of the ladies from my "Blessed is She" group (did I mention you really need to check out this group if you are looking for an awesome online support group of wonderful Catholic women...) invited us to pray this prayer with her over the next 33 days.  It is just what I needed.  It has reignited my spiritual fire and brought me even closer to Mary with a greater understanding of her intercession and ability to draw us closer to Christ.  Tomorrow I will head to mass and make my consecration to Christ through Mary.  I can't help but be a little bit excited and look forward to the fruit of this time in my life.  If you've never heard of this book and are looking to make the consecration I really encourage you to take the plunge! It has been such a blessing to the entire group of us.

***5***

Tonight Noah, our almost 2 year old who was born at 27 weeks, took about 10 steps across the kitchen unassisted!!!!  Woot woo!!  Our little fighter is almost there!! Soon he'll be running all over the place...I can just feel it.


***6***

Today I bought this picture from a friend's garage sale.  She had posted it on Facebook and it brought tears to my eyes and took my breath away.  Most of you know that we have a son in heaven after he was born much too early and lived only 4 days here on this earth.  I always imagine Jackson is looking out for his brothers here on earth and is their special angel.  I often tell the boys to tell Jackson "hi" in their dreams and love thinking about them meeting there.  I gotta be honest though, as lovely and special as this picture will be for me, it made me miss my son terribly.  I wish my 3 boys could all play together.  I wish we all had the pleasure of knowing Jackson beyond the NICU covered in tubes and attached to machines.  I still grieve the life that was robbed from me and wonder what my little 2.5 year old would be up to.  What he would look like and what kind of temperament he would have.  Would he love trains like his brother?  What would be his favorite books and foods to eat?  It grieves my heart and brings me back to those moments when we had to say good bye not only to our son, but also the dreams we had for his life.  So for today I'll let myself miss my sweet little boy and I'll be grateful when I pass by this picture knowing that a little glimpse of my oldest son still lives on in our home.


***7***

Weekends with my family are my favorite! We have a lot to get done around these parts this weekend, but it's always funny making memories out of the little things.

That's my sign off for the rest of you...go make the little moments count this week!



Friday, March 27, 2015

7 Quick Takes:Grouch from the Couch

It's Friday...and this week it feels like I am crawling into home plate versus sliding in with glee.  It's been a long week....a trying week, with moments of joy thrown in there.  So let me explain further...

***1***

So somehow this coming Sunday is Palm Sunday and the start to Holy Week.  I've gotta tell you that once again I'm pretty sure if God were giving grades out for our Lenten sacrifices and prayers I would most certainly get a D.  (It would be an F except we did go to Mass each week so I can't fall under the total failure department....just really, really close.) Anyways, well Holy Week starts in a few days and I love Holy Week.  So today I was thinking about the upcoming services and I realized that my children nap or sleep during most of them.  Not to mention a 2.5 hour service with a toddler might be enough torture to bring my almost failing grade up to at least a C.

So tell me....what do those of you out there with toddlers do for Holy Week?  Do you tough it out? Do you do something special at home?  Go for bits and pieces? Divide and conquer with your spouse??  At this point I think we may make the Living Stations on Good Friday and Easter Sunday Mass, but otherwise I don't see the rest working out.  And I gotta be honest, although this is my reality for a short season, I'm pretty bummed out.

***2***

So this great thing has started happening this week.  Noah has started to "play" with Jonah.  He goes up to him and laughs (ok and pulls his pacifier out) and hugs on his brother.  It's gotta be the cutest thing out there.  I love watching them interact.  Jonah loves Noah too and often stops fussing when he comes around.  He likes to watch him.  It gives me hope for lots of fun as brothers in the future.  My prayer is that they'll always be best buddies.  So far, so good....

***3***

So in just a few days our Jonah will be hitting the 3 month mark.  In my eyes this means it's time for a schedule and to begin getting ready for his own crib.  The thing is our little guy doesn't care for his crib so much and he's still waking up way too much in the middle of the night for me to be trudging up and down the stairs to feed him.  So we are going to start by getting him on a schedule where he eats more, less often.  Right now he wants to eat roughly every 1.5 hours and for some of you mamas out there, that's no big deal, but for this mama chasing a toddler it is.  And the middle of the night stuff....gotta go! Yeah, I'm over the newborn stage.  Anyways, wish me luck. 

Oh and can I be blunt...please don't tell me it's better to feed on demand...even if it is...because at this moment I don't care.  (If I'm being honest....)

***4***

It's snowing.  It's March 27 and it's snowing outside.  I am boycotting by wearing capri leggings inside.  Take that winter!

***5***

I keep thinking I should take my boys for the obligatory shot with the Easter Bunny.  I kind of think the bunny is stupid and most of them are a little creepy, I mean who is in that costume?? At least Santas are cute little old men with white fluffy beards.  So anyways, anyone know where a non creepy Easter Bunny is hanging out that we can sit with?

***6***

When I get some time I'm gonna write more on this topic, but I've been really thinking about the danger in comparison when it comes to the moms in my life.  I've caught myself and listened to others lately comparing and more importantly stating our failures when it comes to what others are doing as moms.  (I'm not sure that sentence makes sense.) Anyways, I've started to notice that when I start to compare things like "Their kid is walking and mine isn't" or "Wow, look how pulled together she is and I have my kids snot on my leg and puke on my shirt." or "Her husband is a gem, they never seem to disagree." It starts to get very dangerous inside my head.  I'm almost 36 years old and those middle feelings of insecurity creep back in.  Like I said, I have a full blog post about this topic going on in my head and if I ever have more than 30 minutes to myself, minus a shower, I might actually get it out there.

***7***

I am so excited about spring and summer!!  We've got our zoo and Village passes ready and can't wait to hit up the neighborhood parks and local splash pads!!  Not to mention so garage sale signs will be popping up all over town!!! I've got my sneakers ready and my change purse too!  Jonah is going to learn to nap on the fly and Noah is gonna learn how to walk!  Spring is springing and hope is all around!

So tell me my local peeps...what's your favorite summer hidden gem? What are the best toddler friendly parks in the area?  Oh and who wants a play date?



So that's that for another week....for those of you participating in Holy Week I pray that it's a week of falling deeper in love with the King of Kings and that you experience the glory and excitement of His Resurrection come Easter Morning. 

I'm off to brew a mug of decaf and relish in the peace and quiet until one of these sleeping angels rises from their naps....

Friday, March 20, 2015

7 Quick Takes:Happy Spring!!



It's the first day of spring finally!! Time for warmer temperatures, tulips popping up, and days spent outside! Here are my 7 random thoughts for this first day of spring!

***1***

My kids are little and day in and out I try to teach them all sorts of things, but these 2 teach me new things every single day.  Let me tell you a little story, yesterday we were heading to my MOPS group early in the morning and as I was changing Jonah I noticed his nails desperately needed to be cut.  So in my usual last minute rush manner I decided to clip his nails.  Well, cutting little kids nails isn't an easy task and when you're rushing it really isn't...well, mommy snipped sweet Jonah's finger.  He began to cry hysterically, I swooped him up, I got blood on my white shirt, he got blood on his and there wasn't time for either of us to change.  Anyways, I felt like the worst mom on the planet and just wanted to hold my little boy.

So what's the point of all of this??  Slow down.  My boys have taught me I need to slow down.  They have taught me that I can't be last minute anymore and that doing things with two little boys takes time.  And I've gotta learn to take a little more time.  When you rush little kids get fingers cut and mommys feel like jerks.  Anyways, another lesson learned.

***2***

Noah is a super picky eater.  He has no problem spitting food out or flight out refusing to eat something, but the one thing Noah will always eat is...quiche.  This kid?! Screw the mac n cheese, the pb&j, and the bananas....not good enough for my kid.  He'll take quiche thank you very much!

***3***

Do you know that at some point every day I think I want to quit breastfeeding? I love it every day too.  Breast feeding is such a commitment and sometimes it's really frustrating.  But the benefits encourage me to keep on going for now.  We supplement with formula each day and that helps give me some relief, but it's hard being the sole middle of the night feeder.  Anyways, I wish I was one of those moms who live and breathe breast feeding, who are able to whip out their boob wherever and when ever with ease and comfort, but truth be told....I'm not.  And that's ok.

***4***

I love other moms.  Twice a month I go to my weekly MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) meeting and I get two whole hours with a table in a room full of other moms.  I cannot begin to tell you what a blessing it has been for me.  Yesterday, we shared and we laughed and we made each other feel like we weren't the worst moms on the planet.  I had bit of a struggle with my Jonah, but all the moms there made me feel better.  They made me feel ok.  I love my Thursday morning MOPS ladies.

The other thing I love about MOPS is each time we go my sweet Noah has the time of his life.  When we leave the daycare workers swoon about how much they love him and how much he's growing.  It's clear they enjoy him as much as he enjoys them.  Yesterday, he sobbed when we got to the car and he realized we were leaving.  I'm glad he loves it so much that it breaks his heart to leave...and breaks my heart to see him so sad.

***5***

Speaking of breaking my heart, Noah also cries each time we bring him in from outside.  We have been so excited to get outside and start enjoying the mild temperatures after a long, cold winter.  Noah's favorite activity so far is to cruise the neighborhood in his car that mommy and daddy push around.  His face is pure joy!  Things have also dried up enough that we were able to make it to the park today for the first time.  He giggled with delight the whole time and enjoyed watching the other kids play around him.  I have a feeling we will be spending a lot of time at our local park with this guy.  I love that we can get out as a family and be active together.  I love that we aren't sitting inside watching TV and instead we are getting fresh air!  I have high hopes for this summer and can't wait to explore all our local treasures with our boys!

"Cruisin the hood. Cries if I take him out.""So much to see!"

***6***

I'm once again really struggling with my weight.  I'm back to my pre pregnancy weight, but truth be told, I was actually 5 pounds less just a bit ago.  Anyways, it's my struggle and being inside with two little boys for the past few months hasn't helped nor the fact that I'm a stress eater.  Anyways, I need some prayers if you have a second.  I really, really need to get healthy for my kids' sake and I need some Divine intervention this time.  I'm really having a hard time getting it together. 

***7***

To piggy back on the above post, I'm trying to work at making myself feel a bit better about myself by dressing the part.  I've recently discovered Jamberry nail wraps and I love that when I take a few minutes to give myself a manicure I love how I feel having some girly looking nails.  I also ordered two pieces of clothing today that I hope will make me feel a little more attractive as well.  Being a stay at home mom is very tempting to stop taking care of yourself and letting things go.  I'm embarrassed to admit that I can't remember the last time I put make up on or where my make up bag even is.  If I make it out of my pjs it's usually to throw on my jeans.  Anyways, I'm working to add some fashion back into my life.  I know that when I do I feel better about myself.  Here goes nothing!

Well, it's 9:30pm, which believe it or not is past my bedtime these days so it's time to publish this ditty and head to bed!  Happy Spring to you all! Get outside this weekend and breathe in some of that fresh air!! 

Friday, March 13, 2015

7 Quick Takes: Nap Time Musings

I'm typing on borrowed time and hoping that Jonah sleeps long enough that I can get these out before he wakes and wants to eat.  So let's skip the fluff and get right to the important fluff. ;)

***1***

Why do I only care about meat on Lenten Fridays???  Enough said about that.

#JimmyJohns

***2***

We have officially entered toddlerhood here at our house.  And although many aspects of toddlerhood are frustrating, I gotta tell you that the number one frustrating thing for me is meal time.  Just because Noah liked something yesterday doesn't hold any guarantees for today.  And some days he will eat if he can do it himself, sometimes he'll eat the sandwich if it's not in pieces and sometimes he wants pieces.  Wednesday he ate eggs like it was his job.  Today they were repulsive (Guess what mommy had for lunch?)  Oh and when he doesn't like something he chooses two paths....spit it out or throw it on the floor.  Did I mention I need a dog??  Anyways, I hope this is a toddler thing and not a vision of things to come. 

***3***

An awesome and glorious thing happened this week....despite it being the week we all adjust to Daylight Savings Time (which might be going away??) Jonah started sleeping from 9:30-4:30 roughly.  Finally, the light at the end of the tunnel is getting so close.  I've never been a night person.  I'm really not good at the middle of the night stuff, so this is an answer to prayer.  After a really bad night earlier this week, I prayed as I was going to bed, "Please Lord, just give me a little break tonight.  I really need to sleep."  Do you know that was the first night Jonah did his 7 hour stretch and so did I?  God is so good like that.  Even to a schmuck like me. 

***4***

People who tell me not to worry about my house right now make me want to punch them.  Hard.  The past 2 days I've been striving to clean and it is just so difficult with a nursing baby and busy toddler.  Yes, I know they are the priority and I try to keep it that way, but we cannot survive without clean dishes, clothes, and a vacuumed floor.  And just when I get things picked up and to a place I can breathe....BAM!!...the next day it feels like we are at square one.  I am so frustrated right now with this aspect of my life.  I want one day with no kids to just clean every room of my house.  To open the windows, smell the Pine Sol, and pitch a few garbage bags of stuff.  Is that too much to ask for??

***5***

We are trying the fish fry circuit this year in an attempt to get out of the house and be with others.  It seems like the Catholic thing to do and my kids seriously love getting out with others....me too.  Tonight we are returning to my roots and trying the fish out at St. Genevieve where I taught for 11 years.  Looking forward to seeing some familiar faces and introducing my boys to them. 

Do you want to know the funniest part of all of this? I'm allergic to fish.  All fish.  So I usually get stuck with the kids mac n cheese or pizza.  Oh well, it's worth it.

***6***

This week I ventured to both the Henry Ford Museum and the Detroit Zoo solo with the boys.  I was really proud of myself.  My Noah loves seeing other kids and being out and about (he gets that from his mom) and my sweet Jonah sleeps like a champ on such adventures.  I was really proud of myself both days.  It's not easy traveling with 2 under 2, and quite honestly it would be easier not to go, but go we did and you know what?  We survived...and not only did we survive, but we had a great time!  I've learned about taking my time, not caring about what others think, and that people are really helpful.  I grow in confidence with each adventure and am looking forward to a spring and summer full of little adventures.  I love that I can be home with my boys.  The joy on Noah's face both days made it so worth it!  My life may be simple for some, but for me it's just perfect.

***7***

Today is the 2nd anniversary of Pope Francis's election as our Holy Father.  I love that man.  I think his spirituality and mine are perfectly aligned.  I love his realistic approach to our faith and yet his conservative nature.  He's a man's man and yet such a holy man of God.  I love how he's shaking up the secular media and conservative Catholics alike!  Rock on, Papa!


And with that I'm done! Jonah's still asleep and I might even sneak a cup of coffee in real quick!  Have a great weekend everyone!

Friday, March 6, 2015

7 Quick Takes:Change

Eleven months ago I wrote my last post on here  I gotta be honest....I've missed it terribly. The thing is, I love to blog, but as me and my friends kid...kids ruin everything.  Well, they don't ruin them of course, but they change things.  Big Time.  And so 11 months later, a new addition to our family, and a lot of changes here I am attempting to blog. Jonah is fed and in his swing and Noah is watching Curious George while eating his snack.  (No judgments)

***1***

Well since I've wrote a miracle of God has occurred.  I have almost started liking doing the dishes.  Almost.  I've realized if my kitchen is in order so is my mind.  I seem to be a happier wife and mother when my kitchen is not overflowing with dishes.  So although I still dislike doing them and they always seem to come back, I like the satisfaction of a clean kitchen at night. 

Now on the other hand one chore I've always loved is laundry.  Never been good at putting it away, but the rest was my chore of choice.  Well, add a husband and 2 children and quickly it has become my least favorite chore.  It never ends.  And those 2 little cherubs...they produce a lot of extra laundry.  I also have yet to figure out how to do laundry downstairs with 2 babies upstairs. Anyways, it's amazing what a year can do to a woman.

***2***

Tomorrow my hubby and I got a babysitter so we can go have a business meeting.  Isn't that funny?  We are actually going to breakfast where we can sit and talk about things without the interruption of a fussy baby and a busy toddler.  I even sent him an agenda of topics.  LOL.  My hubby likes to think about things before we go so that helps...I'm not really that OCD.  I'll be honest...I can't wait.  Talk about changes, 2 kids changes your conversations and time for conversations.  So we are taking some time away for that.

***3***

Our littlest guy, Jonah, is such a fun kid.  And by fun I mean, he's a lot like his mama.  He's got a great smile and loves to talk, but when he's pissed or hungry....well watch out! Noah is our easy going little guy, so Jonah is teaching us about change.  We have to change our method and ways we soothe with Jonah.  We have to love him differently.  I get frustrated with him at times and my oh my does he have a set of lungs on him, but I think he's gonna be a force to be reckoned with when he's older.  He's got passion and determination (much like me...) and I like to dream he's gonna be our go getter!  President 2056??

Did I mention he's got my dimples??  :::swoon:::

***4***

When I was single I was involved in so many minisitries and church activities.  But with kids quickly all of that seems to have fallen off the spectrum for us.  But I'll be honest.  I miss it like crazy.  My wise friend Mary and I were having a heart to heart about such topics like this, and although I think our church lacks when it comes to reaching out to mothers like other churches do, I also think I recognize my need to make time for church activities.  I need that community.  I need other moms, other Christians, time away to draw closer to the Lord.  So if you have any activities coming up at your church that you think would be a good fit for me please let me know!

***5***

We just got back from Florida.  I am so glad we went, but man oh man, I don't know if I will travel with two young kids again for a long, long time.  It was a challenge.  Like super, duper challenging.  Two kids in laps on full flights with suitcases, a double stroller, and luggage....well it's hard.  It was so worth it to get away and see my parents and be able to take the kids swimming and to the beach, but honestly....it was a stress for me.  I think we will be doing the Michigan thing for the next little bit. 

***6***

When I was younger I swore I'd never drive a minivan.  I was convinced I would be that cool mom in an SUV, but my oh my add 2 kids in car seats, a huge double stroller, the need for space and all I can dream about is when my car is up for lease and we can upgrade to a minivan.  My family isn't too happy with me, but unfortunately Ford doesn't make a minivan anymore and I want the automatic sliding doors and trunk.  I want my kids to be able to climb in the car without my help.  Oh and judge me if you will, but I want the DVD player.  Noah is a horrible traveler and I'm convinced a movie will make traveling possible once again.  So we are going to the dark side and heading to Chrysler or Dodge (Staying in the American made category at least) Watch out, this mom will soon be one of those "Mad Moms in a Minivan!"

***7***

And finally....check out this change....pretty great, huh??